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Monday, 11-Feb-2002

 

Spurious thoughts and idle musings from the sports week just past ...

 

Final score ... Minnesota State Supreme Court 1, Bud Light 0.  In another in a long streak of legal setbacks for the lords of baseball, government of the people, by the people, for the people decreed last Tuesday that the Twinks shall not perish from the earth.  Which means the Spos also survive to play another season in Montreal in front of beaucoup empty plastique seats.  Undaunted, Selig says he'll try again next year to contract at least two if not four MLB teams .  But for now, it's time to play some ball.

 

I'm only gonna say this once and then I'm gonna let it go ... The Olympics are supposed to be about sports.  You know ... Citius, altius, fortius and a bag of chips.  Supposed to be the world's finest athletes coming together in John Lennon peace and harmony and the brotherhood of man and so on.  But in my opinion, the United States comes dangerously close to blurring the already fuzzy line these days between patriotism and jingoism.  Yes, I know the World Trade Center flag is sacred cloth and the singing NYPD cop belts out a superb God Bless America but I just wonder if sometimes we honestly don't know when to stop shoving it down the rest of the world's throat.  Okay, end of rant, I promise.  On to other Pics notes ...

 

Can the Swedish Olympic team walk past the cameras again please ???  And the Norwegians too if you don't mind.  Man, ain't nothing quite like several dozen healthy Scandinavian babes on parade.  Sigh ... Um, where was I ???  Oh yeah, smart move by Dubya to sit in the stands with the American team although I'll betcha the Secret Service went nuts seeing Sasha Cohen hand him her cell phone.  And yes, despite my earlier rant, I enjoyed the hell outta seeing the 1980 Boys Of Winter back together again.  They were clearly the best choice to light that candle.

 

Is there a more depressing game than the NFL Pro Bowl ???  No doubt the star players love it ... Like who wouldn't enjoy a week's vacation in Hawaii on the league's dime.  But for serious pig fans suffering from massive Supe withdrawal, seeing the Pro Bowl's salad bar of different team helmet colors and logos flying around out there in the Pacific sun is pure torture.  Sigh, is it September yet ???

 

Downhill.  I love the downhill.  My favorite event by far.  And even if the Austrians do in fact dominate this race like the Yankees own the American League, I could care less what country wins it.  Just so long as the world's most certifiably insane jocks keep on flying, I'll keep right on watching every hundredth of a second of it every four years.  Fritz Strobl, Lasse Kjus, Stephan Eberharter.  Never heard of them before Sunday.  And I'll never forget them now.

 

Super Bowl Champion New England Patriots ... And if you think that's still hard to believe, just be glad you're not a Boston bookie.  Word's leaking out that Beantown bettors absolutely destroyed local bookmakers with many of them perhaps going outta bizness ... Straight up, with the points, under the over/under line, even those quirky proposition bets like how many drinks Bob Kraft would have by halftime ... Didn't matter.  Patriot Nation bet every last baked bean they had on their boys and now the local wiseguys are in deep deep chowder.  You don't see it very often but this time it was heart over head in a blowout.

 

Man, these college football recruiting geeks who get all jiggy come national signing day need some serious lives.  It's the same thing every year ... Big State U signs a fresh boatload of raw high school talent.  The usual gaggle of self-appointed experts then ranks BSU way up there which naturally sends their alums dancing in the streets and making travel plans for future New Years.  And of course it's ridiculous since no one can possibly tell how a bunch of 18-year-olds will adapt to playing college pig over the next four years.  Losers.

 

Um, wait, on second thought ... Amazingly enough, last Monday my beloved Virginia Cavaliers actually inked a consensus national Top Ten incoming football class.  ESPN even had 'em ranked No. 5.  Lotsa bonafide blue chips from all over the place including two nasty linebackers and several stud running backs.  Best class in the ACC.  Even better than Diddy's Criminoles.  Somebody please pinch me.  Or better yet, anybody got tix to the Fiesta, Sugar, Orange and Rose Bowls for the next four years ???  Wahoo-wa.

 

Didja see the special new uniforms that Danny Boy's Washington Dead$kins are gonna wear during next season's home games ???  According to the press release, in honor of the team's 70th anniversary, their new threads will be a deeper shade of burgundy and the helmets will feature that old spear and feathers logo they wore way back in the Sixties.  Yep, the same kinda spear and feathers that Florida State sports.  The same Free Shoes University that used to keep Steve Spurrier up at night.  The same Steve Spurrier now coaching in Fight For Old DC.

 

Once more on the first weekend in Salt Lake ... Did anyone else cringe when you heard Bob Costas and Katie Couric slobber all over Spence Eccles, the rich Utah bank dude who donated $7 million to help offset the cost of the Opening Ceremonies ???  The same ceremonies that cost $885 bucks a ticket, that is.  And how come the halfpipe snowboarders are dressed like your kids on a school snow day ???  Wouldn't they snowboard better if they wore the same skintights the speedskaters wear ???  And I sure hope there'll be decent figure skating coverage.  God knows we don't get enough of that.  Switch to decaf, Scott Hamilton.

 

See ya nexted week ...

 

Robert E Hunt Jr

 

Copyright ã 2002 by Robert E Hunt Jr.  All rights reserved.