Monday, 4-Feb-2002
Spurious
thoughts and idle musings from the sports week just past ...
Correction
... Make that the Second Greatest Show On Turf as Adam "Not The
Norwood" Vinatieri nailed a 48-yard figgie with a clock fulla zeroes to
lead the plucky New Englanders to a wild Supe 36 win over the two-touch
favorite Ramjets. Most shocking Supe
upset since Joe Willie guaranteed his own finger-wagging immortality. And first title in Ye Olde Chowdah Towne
since the 1986 Celts which of course begs the obvious question ... Now that The
Vince is bound for Beantown, whatever will Bahston do now without a losing
football team to whine about ???
Didja
catch the hype on the new Air Jordans ???
Set to roll out this coming weekend, say hello to Nike's new Air Jordan
XVII ... And yes, those are actual live ancient Roman numerals used to name a
sneaker ... The XVII comes in a shiny metallic silver briefcase rather than a
shoebox and also includes a CD-ROM detailing the story of the sneak. All for 2 Benjamins. And the most amazing angle to all this is
that stock market analysts predict kids will just keep 'em in their rooms and
only take 'em out to show their friends.
Well, I
was all set to wave a sentimental see ya to the legendary booth team of Pat
Summerall and John Madden ... But then Big John showed advanced signs of
football dementia when he took the Pats to task for actually daring to win it
all with 1:30 left and no timeouts.
Take a knee and wait for overtime, he said. Yeah, it's only the National Special Security Event, John. You know, like for the intergalactic
champeenship of the entire civilized world and all that. Heck, no sense trying to squeeze every last
second trying to you know like win it or anything. Buh-bye, fellas.
U2. U.
2. It's a beautiful day. Best band in the world. Everybody else is playing for second place
... And although I'm sure Terry Bradshaw fulfilled his lifelong ambition, FOX
should be warned that under no circumstances should any of their employees ever
be allowed to sing a duet with Paul McCartney ever again. Ever.
Just brutal.
Johnny
Pesky, Mike Torrez, Bill Buckner and .... Willie McGinest ??? Almost.
Whew, good thing Willie's Patriot pals bailed him out cause
"Holding, No. 55, Defense" was about to join "It's gets by
Buckner and here comes Ray Knight to score." in the Pantheon of all-time
historic New England sports goofs. Good
thing for the rest of us too as now they won't need to torture us with songs,
poems and other sad laments about the cruel twists of their star-crossed
fate. Well, there is still that whole
Babe Ruth thing.
Utah
hoops bench boss Rick Majerus lost his ESPN/USA Today coaches' poll voting
privileges last week when a poll staffer noticed that The Rick had ranked
Temple with a 6-12 record as high as the No. 9 team in the country. Majerus explained that it'd really been one
of his assistants who'd been voting for the Owls all along but he accepted his
demotion gracefully and apologized to all concerned. No truth to the rumor that the BCS suits immediately offered to
let Majerus and his staff vote in their polls from now on.
Supe ads
were the usual mixed bag ... My fave this year was Who's Hank Aaron advising
Barry Bonds to retire. Also Cedric's
"So how much?" Bud Light spot was laughworthy and the six degrees of
Kevin Bacon was a cool inside joke. And
I'm guessing that the skinny dude with the rubber band legs in the wifebeater
and lightweight Levi's was special effects but if not he's the next Turbo and
Ozone. However, Britney Spears is way
too close to the brink of oversaturation and I could care less what an mlife is
or who should get one.
Hello,
National Dynasty Clearinghouse, how may I help you ??? Yes, Mr Martz, we've already withdrawn your
application. Keep in touch, sir.
The Pro
Football HOF in Canton has some new extra large yellow blazers on order ... Jim
"At Least I Knew Where My Helmet Was" Kelly, Dave "Holy
Roller" Casper, John "Not The Swann" Stallworth, Dan "Guess
I Picked The Wrong Week To DUI" Hampton and the late George Allen, the
legendary Rams and Skins coach who actually caught pneumonia and died after his
Long Beach State players dumped a full Gatorade victory bucket on him back in
1990. All in all, a fine Hall haul.
Repeat
after me ... There is no way in hell the NC2A will ever repeat ever give
Alabama the death penalty like it did to SMU way back when. For that matter, each and every one of the
Enormous Cash Cow Schools can do whatever they want and they're as bulletproof
as Slick Willie ever was. Nope, in
spite of the Crimson Tide's third set of infractions in the past six years ...
And this time it was a $115,000 stack to a high school coach in Memphis ...
Bama still got away with nothing more than some slapped wrists and a few less
scholarbribes. Around the bowl, down
the hole ... Roll, Tide, roll.
After
eight incredible years together as player and coach, Andre Agassi and Brad
Gilbert are parting ways. Andre's
accomplishments under Gilbert's tutelage include six men's Grand Slam titles,
the 1996 Olympic gold medal and the world's No. 1 ranking at the close of the
1999 season. Neither would say why
they've decided to call it quits but you hafta wonder if perhaps Fraulein
Forehand hasn't been reminding Andre that new hubby-daddys really shouldn't be
out and about with the boys anymore.
Nah, she wouldn't do that.
Rest in
peace, Night Train.
See ya
nexted week ...
Robert E Hunt Jr
Copyright ã 2002 by Robert E Hunt Jr. All rights reserved.