Monday, 25-Nov-2001
Spurious
thoughts and idle musings from the sports week just past ...
Helluva
holiday weekend in college pig as several wannabes are now staggering around
with forks stuck in their backs. First
to fall was unbeaten Nebraska who went down hard against the Ralphies. Then Michigan validated the bygone John
Cooper Era by graciously allowing the Ohio State Poisonous Nuts to end their
Big Ten dreams. And the Sooners said
see ya as well as they honked at home to 27-point doggie Okie State. All of
which now means we're looking at Canes and Gators for the mythical come
January. Maybe.
Memo to
Tags ... For the love of God, please eighty-six those godawful throwback
uniforms. Thanksgiving is supposed to
be the ultimate male holiday full of way too much food and football but please
spare me the Lions looking like Goldie Hawn's "Wildcats". Same goes for the Pack looking like yellow
bug lights. Okay, I admit it was kinda
cool seeing the Doncs in their old "Orange Crush" threads but without
Dan Reeves there on the sidelines throwing his headset and stomping on his
clipboard, it just ain't the same.
You know,
it dawned on me that they've been playing this golf thing called the Skins Game
for 19 years now and I still have no clue just exactly what it is or why the golf
world gets its knickers all knotted up over it. All I know for sure is the tube does backflips for it and
somebody famous always walks away with one of those big ol' honkin' checks. Like that doesn't happen enough.
As long
as place settings are on our holiday shopping list, let's order a few more
forks for some NFL toasteds ... Without The Edge running wild and with Peyton
Manning serving up picks a la mode, the Horseshoes are outta luck. As are the Tites who actually found a way to
make Kordell Stewart look good. Also,
the Bolts and Bungles have reverted to expected form while the Jints and Saints
Be Praised are looking suspiciously like last year's one-shot wonders. Too bad so sad.
Davidson
College of All Things Righteous, Pure and Wonderful 58, The Evil Empire of All
Things Most Foul, Wicked and Heinous 54.
Yes indeed, sports fans, with a most delightful 0-2 record at home
against Hampton and Davidson, two otherwise insects on their windshield, the
Carolina Baby Blue Faithful are actually muttering the dreaded "R"
word to themselves ... Yep, that's the one ... And I've waited thirty l-o-n-g
years to hear it ... R-E-B-U-I-L-D-I-N-G ... Let the f-u-n begin.
The
following item was in my local sports page on Saturday ... London (AP) --- The
English Football League plans to draft a code of conduct for mascots after
Bury's "Robbie The Bobby" was ejected for lowering his trousers at
Bristol City fans on Tuesday. Recently,
Swansea City's "Cyril The Swan" kicked the head of Millwall's
"Zampa The Lion" into the crowd.
Unquote.
So what's
new in The Association ??? Several
players including His Shaqness got fined by the Uniform Police for wearing
their shorts too long. Shaq also whined
about Chief Big Triangle's coaching methods while Mark Cuban complained about
Shaq's foot faults at the free throw line.
Meanwhile, it seems the more Floor Jordan's Cheese Wizards lose, the
more they're on the tube. And that was
Tim Hardaway ragging on his time spent in Miami under Pat Riley's heat. The same Tim Hardaway who made the All-Star
team twice under General GQ's reign.
Somehow
it's fitting that such a splendid baseball season should wind up with two very
intriguing MVP awards ... The Barry was clearly the call in the National League
but I still find it mildly amusing that he just can't get the love. I mean, the dude had perhaps the greatest
season with the stick since Roy Hobbs but he just rubs everybody every wrong
way in doing so. Seriously, mark my
words, when it comes time for his inevitable Hall vote, some sportswriter is
gonna bone him just on sheer principle.
And then
there's Ichiro, the American League MVP ... I dunno if Ichy won on the novelty
vote or if he truly was the reason the sensational M's won a whopping 116
ballgames. Still, Seattle's Japanese
import was just a great story this year.
And in the years to come, if even more wannabe-sans can make the same
leap to The Show, maybe just maybe we can have a real World Series someday. And I got just the place to play it,
too. Gorgeous little tropical island
halfway across the Pacific. I believe
both countries know how to get there.
I've been
taking my youngest daughter to Panthers games with me every year since Year 1
down in Climpson back in 1995. Cute as
a button too with her Panthers do-rag and two blue Panther paws glitter-painted
on her little cheeks. Well, she's a
teenager now and yesterday's home loss to the Falcs was her first game this
season. And so midway through the 2nd
quarter, she asked to borrow my trusty binoculars. And not five minutes later, I hear ... "Wow, 35 has a nice
butt." Sigh, I am so d-o-o-m-e-d.
Rest in
peace, Bo Belinsky.
See ya
nexted week ...
Robert E Hunt Jr
Copyright ã 2001 by Robert E Hunt Jr. All rights reserved.