Monday, 10-Sep-2001
Spurious
thoughts and idle musings from the sports week just past ...
History
was made at the US Open as the women's singles final paired V Williams against
S Williams. First time two sisters met
for a Grand Slam tennis title since a coupla Victorian English chicks hooked up
at Wimbee back in 1884. Unfortunately,
we didn't get much of a match this time around as V kicked some serious S booty
in straight sets. Dad said he was too
nervous and flew home but Mom stuck around long enough to pocket two checks
totaling $1.275 million. Which is more
than enough for an upgrade to first class.
Week 1 of
a new NFL season is always a hoot in my house cause that's when my girls hit me
with a fresh batch of "I Still Don't Understand Football"
questions. And this year's collection
was stellar as usual ... "Why is that quarterback guy holding his ears
like he's trying to hear somebody?"
"I thought this was football. How come they're on a baseball
field?" "What's that red flag
for?" And my personal favorite ...
"Who are the Panthers playing?"
"Um, they're at Minnesota."
"Oh, then how come you're not there?"
Well, it
wasn't the Hindenburg but some anxious moments on Friday as the MetLife blimp
slated for the Chiefs game broke loose from its mooring in Kansas City and
floated away unpersoned for two hours and about 75 miles before landing on top
of a truck belonging to the Minnis Burial Vault Company. No relation to Marvin "Snoop"
Minnis, KC's speedy new rookie wideout.
Nobody was hurt but the dirigible had to be placed on the Physically
Unable To Blimp list for the game on Sunday.
Hopefully, it'll suit up next week.
More
tennis ... Second year in a row that Pistol Pete Sampras got wiped out by a
20-year-old phenom at the US Open men's final.
Last year, it was Russian Marat Safin but this year we saw Aussie
heartthrob Lleyton Hewitt administer a most thorough spankjob in three straight
punishing sets. Granted, the
thirtysomething old man had to survive a Rafter, Agassi, Safin gauntlet just to
get to the final but Hewitt cleaned his clock and took home $850,000 US
dollars. Otherwise known as real money.
And what
a Week 1 she was too ... Norv Turner musta been awfully jiggy seeing his new
Bolt offense flay the Dead$kins alive.
Sting's Raiders nipped the Arrowheads in yet another classic and the
Saints Be Praised look pretty spiffy in their new threads. Meanwhile, Edge James sure looked lost
without those voluntary summer workouts he blew off, don'tcha think ??? And lo and behold, my Panthers actually
pulled a stunner by winning 24-13 in ... all together now ... Minnesota. Any given Sunday, baby.
Operators
are standing by ready to accept applications for The Official Fresno State
Bandwagon. First up was a 24-22 win
over Colorado, a perennial Big 12 contender.
Then came a 44-24 crusher over Pac-10 heavy Oregon State who was SI's
pre-season national title pick.
Emphasis on the "was".
And now a 32-20 road beating over Big Ten power Wisconsin. Watch these Bulldogs cause their remaining
schedule is pure creampuff so they're set up perfectly now for the annual
ritual Boning Of The Non-Superpower Power come BCS time.
More red
faces over the green faux turf at The House Of The Exploding ACL aka Philly's
Veterans Stadium. Seems those infield
base cutouts that gave the grounds crew fits this NFL preseason were much
greener than the fixed turf which has been out in the sun all summer. So the eggheads in charge took the turf
patches and laid them out flat in The Vet's parking lot so they could catch
some rays. Whereupon incoming Phillies
fans drove their cars over 'em, walked all over 'em and stamped out their
smokes on 'em. Hard to believe, Harry.
Amazingly
enough, Barry Bonds just might actually top Cardinal McGwire's 70 dinger record
by the time this baseball season is done.
Bobby's kid crushed three monster jacks at Coors on Sunday and now
stands just 8 tates short of Mac's record.
Fortunately for Bonds, he has 18 games left to see if he can do it. Even better for Barry, none of the remaining
games are in October, the month when he and his lumber traditionally nail a
Thornton Mellon Triple Lindy.
I tuned
in the local sports talk radio station on my way home from work Friday and
caught most of a bitchfest over the next day's Notre Dame at Nebraska
game. You know the drill. It was the usual hot air ... Big Red this,
Irish that, weak schedule here, tradition there, you suck, no you suck and so
on. But one Husker caller in particular
stood out when he insisted that a Nebraska win was a lock because ... and I quote
... "Coach Frank Solich's father died and I just know the team is gonna be
really pumped for that." Unquote.
More
baseball notes ... My Phils are three and a hook back but play seven outta
their next 10 games against the Tomaflops.
Pudge's knees are shot and so is the rest of his and the Strangers
season. Red Sox Nation is pushing up
daisies as Pedro insists he's done too.
Curt Schilling got his 20th, Al Leiter got a triple and the
afore-mentioned Flops actually believe Julio "Bring Out Your Dead" Franco
is the latest answer to the gaping wound they've got at first base following
the Rico Brogna and Ken Caminiti double stinkers.
But all
is well in Grungeland as the amazing M's have clinched the offs and still might
break the all-time single season dubya record.
In fact, things are so good in Seattle they actually recently convinced
Ichiro to dress like a Hooters girl as part of some rookie hazing ritual. Man, wouldn't you love to be the translator
for that exchange ??? Ah, so,
Ichiro-san, honorable manager Piniella-san tell me to ask you prease put on
tight shirt with owl and rittle orange pants.
Yes, now prease.
Yes sir,
I am enjoying The John Bunting Era.
Very much, thanks for asking.
See ya
nexted week ...
Robert E Hunt Jr
Copyright ã 2001 by Robert E Hunt Jr. All rights reserved.